mall trip, spring fling, march 30, 2008

So I am finally updating after a long hiatus. Actually I’ve just been really lazy, really busy, or jus too depressed to write often. This year to tell you the truth has been an extremely difficult one filled with highs and extremely low lows. My depression and anxiety levels have almost driven me crazy where I contemplated and almost carried out some less than pleasant plans. But the important thing is that I managed to gain control of my crazy self and I’m still here.
I am almost done with high school-I can’t believe how fast 4 years have gone! I am within the last two months of classes. It seems like just yesterday I was attending this special evening for freshman students. I remember being introduced to lacy and someone showing me that she is really ticklish so I would threaten her by making ticklish motions at her. I remember chasing my friend Alice around the school building and walking from class to class with my then best friend Maria. I remember writing a play for English and being allowed to bring a fake gun to class because my play required me to commit suicide. I remember meeting Mr. Clatterbuck. I remember staying after school with Alice and Mr. bray going over stuff for a math midterm or final. I was just bothering Mr. Bray and threatening him and he goes, “that’s ok your about as big as my son Cosmo. (he’s really young and was younger still 4 years ago.) I remember hitting Jon on the head with a Spanish binder and him threatening to get me back (which he never did, even after I reminded him.)
I remember last year getting into dissing battles with Stuart and Matt. I remember it started during geo class when we were seated together and they were talking about dragon ball z and then somehow I became like a dragon something. It was awesome. During class we would just diss each and it was amazing. And I would harass matt in Mr. Molloy’s English class, In beckbriggs’ English class. I remember freaking out during beckbrigg’s final. I remember teaching in Mr. Molloy’s class on a book review for God is not great how God poisons everything and I actually did a pretty good job.
And this year being in Algebra 2 again but doing better and having fun. I remember especially the bridge exercise.
Speaking of memories today was a pretty awesome day. I got to hang out with VY, my best friend for the past few years but I haven’t seen her in years. She called me while I was taking a nap and we talked for awhile. We talked about the fact that I was going to college in a few months. We talked about how expensive college is. Vy and I started getting emotional; when we started talking about love. She told me how she’s afraid she would never find that one person who would love her and I told her I was afraid that I would find someone, we would fall in love, get married but then get divorced. I was afraid that he would change or that we would just fall apart.
After we talked she invited me to go to the mall with her which of course I agreed and we had an awesome time. We went shopping, she was able to buy a prom dress either for her prom or if she can’t go to hers since she needs a date, I invited her to mine. She also wanted to go with me to the school’s dance at spring fling but I tried calling various people and Mr. bray about inviting her but he never got back to me. I left the most awkwardest message on his answering machine and at the dance I tried to avoid him but then I saw him and I was like, “I left the most akwardest message on your answering machine” and he says confused, “ok” and my girlfriend Sarah just starts laughing. But anyway sacks to the mall with Vy. It was awesome. I tried on so many different cheap prom dresses and ended buying two and paying $72 which is good for two dresses. And they are both gorgeous. Vy picked out my prom dress and it looks amazing on me, and I picked out my spring fling dress and it looked awesome on me two. I got a lot of comments on that dress. And it was just awesome being able to hang out with Vy, not only my best friend I hadn’t seen an ages but also someone my age. I usually just go to the mall with my mom and een though I love her it’s no fun. She didn’t really like the dress I had on today, she considered it to sexy . Plus she would just complain and nag all day about one thing or another. I hate to hurt her feelings but she just doesn’t know when to stop and she talks in that little kid voice which I guess is cute but I want to have some normal conversation every once in awhile. I just loved spending time with her.
She also took me to try on jeans. Now because I attended a strict Pentecostal church during the last few years I have worn only skirts but since I left the church and am heading off to college in a few months I want to pull away from that and start wearing jeans again. Now the last time I wore jeans, I was 13 and there was only one style of jeans. Now there are literally dozens so I had no idea what the differences were when Vy started spewing out different jean names. But it was funny because when I tried on the jeans I couldn’t get them past my butt. It could have been because I was wearing stockings but like I told Vy I was not taking them off. (I hadn’t shaven in awhile, but no worries I did tonight for the dance.)
And tonight at the dance was awesome! I saw nallo who left Moravian last year and I actually got to hang out with her today and dance with her to one republic’s apologize. I got to hang out and dance with members of my class. I got to hang out with some juniors. Plus Moravian College gave me such an awesome financial aid package that I couldn’t believe it1 it was awesome! I was happy and just dancing with all of my friends. The only really awkward moment was when I accidentally walked into an underclassman. But there was a chocolate fountain; I had my picture taken with my friends. I of course managed to get chocolate on my beautiful white dress but Sarah V helped get it off. I talked with Ian and darius about staring a socialist club and Ms. Beckbriggs don’t me if we do start one it needs to be called something else. she said something like progressive student alignment or something like that. It was awesome. Dancing and seeing some of the teachers. Hanging out with people I don’t normally hang out with. It was awesome. And right now I am just uploading some senior pics into my facebook account. I am def taking more during these last two months of classes. And tomorrow is def a school work day.